David: Mom, are you enjoying The Voice?
Mom: Oh yes! Adam and Christina just sang together. Christina tried to hug him when they finished, but Adam wasn’t paying attention so he had to rush to hug her back at the last minute. She looked upset, but I don’t think Adam intends to do those things on purpose. He just lives in the moment. He’s a tell-it-like-it-is kind of guy.
David: (skeptical look) Geez, Mom. You really like Adam, don’t you?
Mom: (a little haughty) Well, yes. Yes I do. I like him very much. I think that he’s genuine. He rubs me the right way, and people on TV just don’t come across that way to me very often. It’s very easy to be phony when the camera is on you, but Adam doesn’t behave like that. Adam is different.
David: (a little stunned now) Would you say…you’re a fan of his?
Mom: Yes, I would! I would like to meet him someday. Maybe have lunch with him or something. He and Rick Bayless. But not Rocco. Honestly, I think Rocco has been a little full of himself lately…
David: Rocco Dispirito? The chef? With the new Bravo show?
David: Wait a second. Let’s rewind for a moment. So, you’d like to have lunch with Adam Levine?
David: What would you ask him?
Mom: Well, normal things I suppose. What he likes to eat. That’s a pretty universal topic. Everyone has a favorite food. Where he was born. Has he ever visited San Antonio before….We would just have a conversation like normal people, for Pete’s sake!
David: Would you ask him about the Christina controversy?
Mom: Oh yes. I would ask him: “Did you really hate her, or was all that scratching and biting just for the us, the viewing audience at home?” Honestly though, I think that it might just be sexual tension. You know, when two attractive people work together so closely, in a high pressure environment, well…things are bound to happen.
Adam? If this somehow gets to you, I want you to know that my mom is about a billion times more hilarious in person. You should totally meet her. And if I should somehow happen to get an autograph and a hug out of that deal, well…all the better.
Reblog this post if you want my mother to meet Adam Levine…I’m not above shameless self-promotion, people.
Don’t worry. I’ll still love you if you don’t…